stuck_mynock | [OOM] Jaq.

"Your head is stupid and you are stupid too!"

"That's just not true."

"It is very true. I am never wrong in these matters."

Seriously: "You're always wrong."

Pause. Jaq looks down at his side. Then, a bit apologetically: "You should probably leave that. Not that I don't want it healed, but if it's too healed up when I go back I'm going to get a lot of awkward questions."

"That's okay, I'll beat you up before you leave. That should fix it."

Lucifer has a solution for everything!

"Ha. Like you could, little guy."

Jaq shall demonstrate his skepticism through the medium of dragging Lucifer into a headlock.

"Could beat you up whenever I wanted!"

It is, for example, much more difficult to perform a headlock whilst being tickled. A lot. With magic.

"Nah, you couldn't," Jaq says, squirming and trying very hard to keep his grip. "You are small and weak, like a baby shrimp."

Lucifer wriggles out of the headlock.

"You are ugly and weak, like an aged walrus!"

"Lies. I am beautiful, like a dove." Beat. "If you're done with me, I'll go take that shower?"

"You are ugly as a peacock in the rain, but begone."

Lucifer flaps a hand in dismissal.

"Okay. I'll see you soon, you hideous wretch, you," Jaq grins, kicking off his boots, shucking off his shirt, and wandering into the bathroom.

"Not if I see you first," Lucifer mutters.

Jaq, he guesses, is probably better sorting himself out from here, so he heads downstairs instead to get them both drinks and food.

By the time he gets back, Jaq is - still in the shower. He's in the shower for a not unremarkable amount of time after that, too, when you take into account that he's usually in and out within ten minutes.

Eventually he emerges with a fluffy towel wrapped around his waist. He still looks a mess (a couple of burns, a lot of mottled bruises, and the marks where the gash is half-healed), but much less so.

If Lucifer could read narration he'd remark sadly that 'in and out within ten minutes' is the story of his life. Perhaps it is for the best.

He's back before Jaq reappears, setting a tray of food and hot chocolate (containing a generous dollop of whisky and topped with an even more generous share of whipped cream and chocolate) down before flopping onto the sofa and stretching out.

Jaq would be shocked and appalled with this deep cruelty.

He ignores the food briefly to wander over to Lucifer, lean down, and kiss him. Tentatively, though - he's not sure how angry Lucifer still is.

He's still very angry, but not with Jaq, so he leans back and up to return the kiss, one hand gently cupping Jaq's jaw.

Eventually: "Sorry for getting hurt. Is there room for me on there?" Nudging the sofa.

Lucifer considers his for a moment.

"No. Don't like you enough."

He has no love at all!

Jaq looks very, very sad.

Lucifer pokes his tongue out!

Jaq snorts, and sits down anyway.

"I don't love you, you know," Lucifer says firmly, sitting up to curl around Jaq.

"I mean, at all. Ever."

"I don't love you either," Jaq replies, reaching up to stroke Lucifer's cheek. "In fact, I outright despise you. You pretty much disgust me." The slightly dopey grin is evidence of this disgust.

He leans his head against Jaq's.

"Good," he says. "I wouldn't want you to think that you don't horrify and appal me, after all."

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